• qyron@sopuli.xyz
    71·
    1 year ago

    What if - and this is a BIG if - this person was actually telling the truth?

    Let’s imagine that JC Sandals decided it was time to come back to Earth and take a look around. No intervention, no preaching, no nothing. Just sight seeing and talking to random people.

    So JC is somewhere in the US (it is a predominently christian country), travelling the land, hitch hiking to get to places.

    Then one day this person just sees this figure walking along the side of the road - long hair, big fuzzy beard, sun bleached Converse All Stars, ratty jeans, a loose t-shirt (perhaps an old, baggy one, with the Master of Puppets stampet on the front) and lets add a beat up military style jacket and a scuffed backpack to finish the look.

    So we have our trucker see this figure and outn of nothing he decides to stop and give him a lift. They go through the motions - "hey, wanna a lift? where are ya headin’? / “that would be nice” “I don’t really care, I’m just going about for myself” - JC hops onto the big rig and off they go.

    After the initial uncomfortable minutes they eventually strike up a conversation, just small talk at first - where they have been, where they are going, the road - and at some point our trucker just lets out he feels alone when doing those long hauls but the good book always gives him strenght to carry on and protects him and helps him go back home safely. And he’s sincere in his words. JC just listens and nods.

    At some point, JC questions our beloved trucker what is his favorite passage or verse on the whole book and our friend happily replies and there is true engagement in the conversation. JC shares some insights and remarks our trucker never considered about the book, some perhaps absolutely against his beliefs, which somewhat aggravates our pour soul trucker. Untill at some point he just can’t stand it anymore and falls silent. He wants, needs, to get rid of this strange hitch hiker, and his strange demeanor.

    So our trucker announces he’s going to stop to refuel and if that destination is good for his passenger. And JC replies it’s just fine. And then of the blue, JC stares at our poor trucker and says.

    “I can see your a good man, so I’m going to take care of that for you.”

    And our trucker miraculously sees the fuel gauge pump up. Now he’s scared. There is something with this man. His throat closes, his heart races.

    “Can you pull up here, please? Right here.”

    And our trucker watches as his hands steer the truck to the side of the road, pulls up and puts it into neutral. JC thanks the poor man, about to crap his pants, opens the door and he is just about to get off the truck:

    “You have your bible on hand? Nevermind that, I’ll give you mine.”

    Then out of his side pocket, JC pulls out THE BOOK, this huge full size copy, smiles at the trucker, pulls the cover to the side, signs it, as we see on the picture, with the dedication and throws it onto the passenger seat.

    “Nobody will ever believe you.”

    JC lets out a laugh and throws the door shut.

    And nobody believes.

  • Wage_slave@lemmy.ml
    11·
    1 year ago

    Would I be an asshole if I started signing the bibles they have at the local thrift stores?

    Your Bud, Jesus “Daddy Looooong J” Christ

    or

    See you soon. Seriously, stop with fatty foods or my bro S to the T Pete and will see you too soon.
    Have a great summer - J.C.

  • Ejh3k@lemmy.worldEnglish
    9·
    1 year ago

    I always sign bibles I find in hotels I stay at. And honestly, fewer and fewer hotels have them.