[A picture of Pepe the frog frowning while holding a gun to its head]

I hit another level this weekend /r9k/

>be me
>like this coworker
>finally get the courage to talk to her
>holy shit things are going well
> invites me to hangout on friday
> says her friends are burning books that go against Christianity
>seriously wtf
>whatever she’s hot
>gets the address

>it’s friday
>don’t understand if I’m supposed to bring my own books
>buy $300 worth of anti-christian books
>put them in two big trash bags
>head over to book burning

>See coworker
>say hi
>“what are in the bags anon…?”
>“I…I brought books for the burning.”
>“Anon I was joking about the book burning”
>it’s a normal fucking party
>don’t know what to do
>pretend to get a call
>walk away and leave books
> start running home leaving my car

I snuck back on Saturday and got my car, but I think I have to fucking quit work now. Theres no way I can see her again.

What should I do? I have a shift on Wednesday.

  • candyman337@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    People grossly underestimate how understanding people will be if you just explain your thought process in a calm and reasonable way. If she asks why he went along with it if he thought that’s what she was actually doing:

    “Look I’m not about the burning books thing but I thought you were cool and I figured I’d just go with the flow and see how things went, worst that could happen is I don’t hang out with you again 🤷‍♂️. I’m glad it’s a regular party though, let’s go hang”

      • dsemy@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        You don’t need to think too hard about what you’re going to say if you just say the truth.

        • Azzu@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          The problem is that the truth is pretty damning imo, like if they’re able to participate in actual book burning they don’t believe in and basically burn $300, I wonder what other dishonest thing they would do just to be liked. Not really something you want to be around.

          I’d only be fine if they honestly explained that they knew it is a problem and they’re trying to fix it.

          • dsemy@lemm.ee
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            1 year ago

            So it would be better for them to be dishonest again and lie about their issues? I don’t think that would lead to a very healthy relationship.

            You can still be honest without telling someone your whole life story. And even if you can’t, it’s still better than lying (and I doubt you’d be a very good liar in that case anyway).

            • Azzu@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              I mean, for them, lying would actually be better, if they don’t understand they have a problem and are trying to fix it. Obviously for literally everyone else it would be better if they were honest.

              Because if they don’t understand that it’s a problem and they’re trying to fix it, then by being honest they would simply be advertising that they’re a shitty person. Shitty people advertising that they’re shitty don’t get very far, they have to be dishonest about their shittyness for anyone to associate with them.

              And believe me, there are a lot of shitty people that are reaaaally good at lying, most often because they are able to successfully deceive themselves and thus actually believe what they’re lying about. I mean how often have you heard that someone “wants to change” but doesn’t actually do anything about it? That is lying.

              The only real solution is to not be shitty anymore, which is why I said, when someone understands what they’re doing is a problem and tries to fix it, then it’s completely fine again.

          • Contramuffin@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            You’re acting like everyone expects everyone else to be a paragon of virtue all the time. Peer pressure works so well that people gave it a name. People get peer pressured into drugs and crime all the time. Of all the things that Anon could have gotten peer pressured into, a book burning party is honestly one of the most harmless things that he could have gotten into.

            The truth isn’t damning if the truth is literally just “yeah lol I felt like I had to fit in.” People would think you’re gullible, but people won’t think you’re malicious

            • Azzu@lemm.ee
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              1 year ago

              Idk, maybe being ready to burn books that go against your ideology registers different for other people, but for me it’s pretty far on the “bad” scale.

              I don’t really have a problem with the being pressured into something, but the exact topic talked about here seems pretty extreme. Of course I don’t expect anyone to be a paragon of virtue, but I just wanted to say that someone that burns books would not be something I’d like to associate with, and I expected that that sentiment was pretty universal

      • candyman337@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Idk man if I’m at that point I’m just gonna be honest, it’s not a panic for me anymore. I’ve learned that just being honest is usually the best thing

      • MsPenguinette@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        You gotta internalize it. Can’t expect to have “calmly explain why you are an idiot” be the reaction in an emergency situation.