my guinea pig herdleader likes when everyone gets to eat a treat.

she didn’t really get why the cat liked meatpaste, but she’d yell until I put out a treat for the cat. I often grab a little something to eat while I sit next to the pen with them while they eat their veggies. it makes them feel like I am part of their little herd. i get all the positive reinforcement grooming and nuzzling affection.

she’s just a little too greedy to give me her food, though.

I’ve got a couple guinea pigs. one assumes the tarp is the limit of his territory, whether or not there’s fencing.

the other one regularly goes wandering, but respects the areas I’ve said are off limits. and she knows she has to get back to her territory - the tarp - to get any treats.

so it’s entirely possible this bunny recognizes his “room”, as defined by the new rug.

quoting from your link: No reductions were statistically significant. Only one difference [re:disease] was statistically significant.

plus it was done by a pro-vegan group with obvious bias. so the results from the pro-vegan funded study are not terribly good at supporting veganism for cats as more healthy. it’s about the same, maybe less disease (severity of disease wasn’t covered in the abstract but would be a significant part of a decision). show me a study not funded by a pro-vegan group with similar or better results before I consider feeding my pet a diet very different from their natural diet.

yeah, I do.

I was a kid on free and reduced lunch. there’s stigma around being poor enough to need it, and I was bullied for it. my home life was sufficiently dysfunctional that it could be the only food I ate that day, and there were still times I’d rather be hungry than bullied.

so in the interest of removing something kids can be bullied over, sure. tax the rich more, and let a relatively tiny bit of our taxes buy every child at least one meal a day.

-childless taxpayer

ferrets are like kittens that never become cats. they get a little slower with age, but given they start like they’re running 3 times faster than the rest of the world, it’s not noticeable until you get a young ferret again.

definitely not. i hope you can find something to help.

imagine you start to get your shit together, start some habits to get you on a better footing, and then there’s a week where you just can’t every month. and maybe there’s also a mid-month slump, because hormones suck.

i didn’t see a therapist until i had one weekend to run all the errands, see doctors and vets, clean the house up… there was just the one weekend where i was sure i’d have enough of an upswing.

-general anxiety and depression diagnosis, plus PMDD (pre-menstrual dysphoria disorder), the drugs are great and i’m better now

my grandpa used commode, but i haven’t heard it from anyone younger. grandpa was a Depression era kid, and the family was poor to begin with.

he also said “shorts” instead of “underpants”, which caused my brother who only wore long pants some confusion and trouble.

if one of these just ramps up the anxiety, skip that sense and do the others. trying to pick 5 things i can see is. …not useful. …in a panic attack. but closing my eyes and doing the others does help. it took a very long time before someone suggested skipping sight to me, so i share the insight whenever this method is suggested.

my cat loses it if she wakes up and can’t see me. I live in a studio. there aren’t a lot of “out of sight” options. at one point, there was just a screen between me, in my computer chair, and her, on the bed. we still did the whole call and response.

she doesn’t look for me, she just starts yelling until I respond.

yep. I self-select out of dog friendly offices. if that’s a “benefit”, I can’t work there.

mostly, yeah! it was a very dysfunctional childhood, but we’re all mostly functional adults.

my HS graduation was on a Saturday, and my mom’s attempt was the following Monday. so I guess this has that beat for awful.

chronic depression really distorts your view of things. my mom honestly didn’t think it would taint my graduation or change my plans. sort of, like she was already gone from my life, so she was just trying to wrap things up?

unsurprisingly, even though she wasn’t successful, she still managed to screw me and my younger siblings up for a fair bit. it’s been 20+ years, and only one of us still is in contact with her.

my cat thinks “up” and “down” both mean “get off my lap”.

she also recognizes that when I sit and talk to myself (voice chat) is perfect petting and cuddles time. she’s well known to my therapist and team because of zoom meetings.

and both guinea pigs and the cat have all decided that we do cuddles about 830pm. I thought it was “after work and dinner, sometime before bed”. but the number of times I look up to see what the fuss is, and it’s 830 and all 3 are looking at me expectantly… I assume they figure the time by daylight, because it’s not consistent when I get home.

for a lot of people in long term polyamory, it’s about intimacy, which sex is part of. even if you have relationships that are primarily about fun sexy times, you’re probably going to do a lot of scheduling to maintain those relationships, or find new ones.

cults often practice polygamy as a few men in power “marry” girls (teenagers or younger), and control the assets. this is a power imbalance that can easily be abused.

polyamory as a modern term is trying to differentiate from that. proponents emphasize enthusiastic consent (from all parties) and communication, and often will warn against any rigid hierarchy among the polycule members. that’s an ideal, so it’s certainly possible to find examples that fail, but the intent is that people are all equally respected.

for me, it’s seeing how similar we are. I went low contact and moved away almost 20 years ago. getting to know my now-transmasc brother when we’re both adults is wild. he’s dealt with things differently, but despite 8 years age gap and 18 years not talking, we have a lot in common still.

I’ve always had anxiety issues, and got to the point of panic attacks before I got help. my psychiatrist says that breakthrough anxiety is normal, when there’s something especially stressful. it’s not something to beat or get past.

since it seems like part of what is causing (perfectly natural) anxiety is that you don’t know what to expect, why don’t you reach out to the dentist to ask what to expect? maybe do a little research, if that won’t send you panicking about the worst case scenarios you come across?

anxiety helps us look and plan for all sorts of future scenarios. if you can’t eliminate it, try to direct it into things you can plan and prepare for. and if it’s still interfering a lot with your life, talk to your Dr about changing the meds.

that’s not what’s meant. they mean, how long you’ve had an account with them, whether you have multiple accounts or loans with the institution, if you’ve been late in paying or carried very minimal balances or have a history of harassing customer service to the point customer service felt the need to record it.

it’s your relationship with the institution, not the ceo, and whether you’ve been a good customer or not really.

I’ve allowed my partner to refer to me as girlfriend to make discussion with others easier. I don’t love it, it doesn’t sound like a longterm adult relationship, but I recognize it’s easier to say “my wife and my girlfriend”.

and both of us go to family Christmas, though not everyone needs to know relationship status.

… you’re absolutely right about the scheduling thing though.