The good: I’m a very curious person and will always look up answers to virtually any question I have. I’m excited to learn new things, I’m an excellent problem-solver, and I’ll share what I can with anyone who asks, particularly at work.

The bad: I’m content with being alone most of the time. People love being around me and having me company, but I don’t make an effort to maintain friendships and the relationships I do have feel like such a struggle to keep up with.

The ugly: I’m severely unmotivated. I’ll do what I need to keep my job and survive, but I don’t have the drive to want to be super successful. I love starting new hobbies but I’ll become hyper-obsessed and suck literally all the joy out of them until I’m no longer interested.

The good: you can rely on me. If I say I’m going to do something or be somewhere, I always see it through.

The bad: I don’t sleep. Not healthy and bad for your brain.

The ugly: the amount of beer I go through in a week has increased exponentially since 2020 and I kinda don’t want to lower it back down.

Before the pandemic and everything I was a social drinker, would go to a bar once a week, hang out with pals and have a few, Uber home and all good. Once I lost being able to go out I lost most of my buddies too. I still have my friends, the close ones, and we all relied on each other to make it through the isolation but none of them live here any longer so being social and going out isn’t something I get to do anymore sadly. That and the crushing knowledge of all the people who died kinda has me not making great choices.

Sorry probably over shared there at the end.

The good: I have an inhuman appetite for math and I’m extremely good at learning new things in seemingly unrelated disciplines like music and politics. I would like to think I am unflinching in my commitment to freedom and equality for all people. I am always looking for detailed answers to questions, which leads to read a lot of textbooks and research papers, usually instead of taking the word of authority figures who claim to be experts. I have a “good ear” for music and non-musical audio applications. I’m good with computers, both hardware and software.

The bad: I’m not good at people. I need to be behind a screen to really flourish. I have to really “get into the minds” of other people because what I would want “in their shoes” is so foreign to the average person. I am always looking for detailed answers to questions, which leads to read a lot of textbooks and research papers, usually instead of taking the word of authority figures who claim to be experts. Practically, this means that I’ve “wasted” a ton of time proving theoretical results to myself that an ordinary student would just trust is correct and move onto topics that actually make them better at their jobs/hobbies. This isn’t a good trait for an engineer. I am unintentionally condescending and cold. I’m a really boring person to be around. Even when I’m talking about death metal or radical politics, I have a particularly robotic way of doing it. I’m never ever satisfied. I don’t like being around people. It is normal for me to see my few friends only once or twice a year, and I wouldn’t want more than that.

The ugly: I am severely depressed, anxious, and poorly adjusted to life in a physical universe. I don’t trust people who are close to me. While I don’t give out my trust willy-nilly to randos, I typically become less trusting as people become closer to me because they’re closer to having seen the real me. I have terrible impulse control when it comes to spending my money, particularly on food. I basically can’t manage my time; I have my phone do it for me. My brain is fucking mush compared to a few years ago; I used to be okay. Although I wrote all three sections to be about the same length, I could write a hundred pages on the bad and the ugly. Yet, I basically exhausted what I could think of with my good traits.

Summary: I’m shit at almost everything except for a few very specific tasks that aren’t really enough to make up for my deficiencies.