The first and only good babylonbee article

  • finitebanjo@lemmy.world
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    6 minutes ago

    From the article:

    “It’s my responsibility to make sure this tyrannical despot assumes power,” Harris told the crowd of supporters after officially conceding the race. “Though he will end freedom itself in this country, imprison anyone who disagrees with him, systematically murder all women, and go door to door kicking everyone’s dogs, I promise to make sure there is a peaceful transition of power.”

    The media hailed Harris’s brilliance and the leadership she displayed while conceding to a man who is literally Hitler.

  • shinratdr@lemmy.ca
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    3 hours ago

    I hate Babylon Bee, but a broken clock & all that.

    Either this situation isn’t as bad as they said it would be during the campaign (which is what Babylon Bee is implying) or it IS as bad as they said it is, and they’re letting it happen anyways.

    Either way, they’re spineless fucking liars.

    • finitebanjo@lemmy.world
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      5 minutes ago

      Theres two main reasons not to stop it from happening:

      1. It would make the DNC as bad as the GOP

      2. The people don’t really deserve more help, tbh.

  • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    4 hours ago

    So… they are criticizing her for not trying to overthrow democracy? Like trying to pull a coup would have been the only rational, non-hypocritical response here? What a worrying attitude

    • RubicTopaz@lemmy.worldOP
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      2 hours ago

      Like trying to pull a coup would have been the only rational, non-hypocritical response here

      Yes. What kind of party hands over power to people they know is fascist?

      A liberal one, yes. Which is the problem, and why liberalism eventually gives way to fascism when a capitalist state is in decline.

      • finitebanjo@lemmy.world
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        3 minutes ago

        The real answer is the kind of party that a majority of voters chose a rapist felon over. I don’t even want to help them, anymore, I started learning German again just in case I feel like leaving.

    • shinratdr@lemmy.ca
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      3 hours ago

      Why is that a worrying attitude?

      They’re criticizing her for saying “he’s facist hitler” through the campaign as the sole message, and then when they lose, shrugging and treating it like any other loss. “Oh well, better luck next time!”

      Babylon Bee’s point is that the rhetoric doesn’t match the actions. If he was Hitler, then why are you handing him the reigns like this is just any other election? Their implication is that the campaign dramatized his impact and demonized him. They’re right about the criticism but wrong about the reason.

      He DOES represent the evils they’ve been espousing, and they are laying down and doing fuck all about it except paving him a clear path. Babylon Bee has managed to accidentally write their most non-partisan headline ever by accident, and a scathing indictment of spineless liberalism.

      • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        1 hour ago

        Why is that a worrying attitude?

        Because it seems to be pointed in the direction of a civil war and an end to the US republic

        He DOES represent the evils they’ve been espousing, and they are laying down and doing fuck all about it except paving him a clear path.

        What do you think should be done instead?

        • TassieTosser@aussie.zone
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          32 minutes ago

          Be as petty as he was and do everything in their power to sabotage what they can and leave him a mess?

  • Skydancer@pawb.social
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    5 hours ago

    I wish this was the right community to post this. Unfortunately, it more properly belongs in nottheonion

  • BakedCatboy@lemmy.ml
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    6 hours ago

    First and only and it looks like Babylon staff didn’t even come up with the idea - at the bottom it suggests this was a reader submission.

  • shoulderoforion@fedia.io
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    10 hours ago

    At first I was surprised this was coming from the Fascist friendly Bee, but then I read it and realized they’re trying to sound sarcastic, but making the correct point perfectly. This is fucking meta.

    • magic_lobster_party@fedia.io
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      9 hours ago

      It’s like some kind of reverse Poe’s law, when the sarcasm of the outrageous minded is indistinguishable from a sane opinion.

      Also Godwin’s law.

      • jballs@sh.itjust.works
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        7 hours ago

        This whole thing is cracking me up. I can imagine them writing all sorts of articles like “Democrats want ALL people to have access to basic needs like food, shelter, education, and health care.” Then MAGAts reading that just laughing their heads off while the rest of us are just stuck wondering where the joke is.

    • Sabata
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      9 hours ago

      Reality got so bad that satire can only state fact.

      • Wilzax@lemmy.world
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        8 hours ago

        There was a political realignment after the civil war where the democrat and the republicans switched roles.

        Now there’s a factual realignment, where reality and satire switch which one is absurd and which one is correct when taken at face value

        • Agrivar@lemmy.world
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          1 hour ago

          Fuck.

          People using “literally” to mean “figuratively” really was only the beginning?

          90s me would be sadly satisfied with how shit’s going right now. Like, everyone prefers to be right, but sometimes the Schadenfreude isn’t worth the squeeze.

  • Carrolade@lemmy.world
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    9 hours ago

    Actually that was a JD Vance quote. Harris kept it more classy.

    Either way, he’s more of a Mussolini type. Less vision, more opportunism.

  • Clent@lemmy.world
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    8 hours ago

    Biden is the one responsible for transferring power. Even right wing satire is full of ignorance. Not that there was ever any doubt.