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Joined 11 months ago
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Cake day: July 24th, 2023

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  • I do use it as a thought terminating statement usually when friends have asked me to help. I ask for them to tell me what has happened and then I suggest a forward plan of action. It is very common for people at this point to feel guilty about having to ask for help and also to go down a spiral of putting all the blame on themselves. Neither of these things are useful as I need their active help and participation in putting the problem right and that’s where their energy needs to be focussed.

    So it this point I will very often say to them something like, “Well, it is what it is and we are where we are and there’s no sense in blaming yourself, let’s see what we can do about getting into a better position.”

    I did encounter a proper thought terminating cliche in the form of, “I hear what you’re saying…” from bosses in various places. Means “I hear what you’re saying but I couldn’t give less of a shit about it even if I were prepared to put in the slightest effort, which I am not.”











  • So he rose to fame here in the UK for a couple of tv plays, Abigail’s Party and Nuts In May which poked fun at the middle class and were very funny at the time but for modern audiences would probably not land the same because of the specific cultural references.

    High Hopes did the same kind of thing on the big screen, once again it’s a snapshot of its time.

    Life Is Sweet and Naked are my favourite films of his and if anyone feels like dipping into his work these are the two I’d suggest you start with, Life Is Sweet is a gentler comedy than Naked, which is probably his blackest film in terms of the comedy. (Vera Drake, which I haven’t seen, is a drama which is reportedly unremittingly bleak.)

    Secrets and Lies was one of his most lauded films, the usual trademarks of his films are here: an interest in the specific signifieirs of class and community, some warm humour and a sympathetic look at family relationships that takes in some difficult material, adoption, race relations etc…

    Topsy-Turvy was his first foray into period/costume drama and tells the story of the writing of the comic opera The Mikado by Victorian era authors Gilbert & Sullivan.

    I don’t know how the humour and drama of these films will land for people that are not from England because it is very English.

    More recently his work is more overtly political and I haven’t kept up with it because, although I suspect that we’d find quite a lot to agree on politically, I go to the pictures to be entertained not to be lectured.