kerplunk

I’m watching a drunk (probably) girl in a fight with her bf (probably) attempting to get his attention by doing dumber and dumber things. He watches her go behind the metal temporary fence, take off her shoes and get in the water. Then she comes out, climbs around the actual security fence and sits there. He gets tired of watching and goes over to drink his beer and look at his phone (if you’re reading this, hi guy). She looks around, realises he’s not watching, and starts swimming away.

Now she’s completely out of sight and he’s just sitting there, phone in hand, staring into space like he’s given up on life. And he’s finished his beer. There’s nothing left.

Edit: ohhhh she’s skinny dipping and one of the other dudebros jumped in with his bermuda shorts on. I need popcorn.

The greater good (the greater good)

My (now passed) kitty would smell when I opened a can of tuna from several rooms away and sprint in screaming “YESSSSSS FUCKIN TUNAAAAAAA” despite knowing he was on a diet. I miss his screaming.

Still actually laugh out loud, not just breathe out through my nose, every time I remember this exists.

I used to live in a house with a big back yard and lots of garden. One day in summer I was digging weeds with my back to the house at the far end of the yard. My toddler son was inside with his dad, my baby daughter was napping. It was a quiet afternoon. After a while I heard little feet thudding on the grass - my son running across the lawn towards me. I turned around expecting him to come up and jump on me. There was no one there.

That’s still a catch phrase between my husband and me when we go somewhere crowded.

Principal was fired by the board, and then immediately sued the school for wrongful dismissal. It was a landmark case and ended up on national news. The principal won and the school went broke. It was the best school in town until then: all the good teachers quit and went elsewhere taking many students with them because parents didn’t want their kids in a broke school with only the crappy teachers left.