• pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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    11 days ago

    Any woman who says “the bear” honestly, I have to assume" has never once actually encountered a bear in the woods.

    Prolly has had extremely few encounters with anything in the woods.

    People hang out on trails all the time, and are alone with another stranger on the trails extremely often, and the extremely vast majority of those interactions are overwhelming positive in all configurations. The vast majority of humans are helpful at worst, for all genders.

    People like to help other people out.

    Yes, I would vastly prefer to encounter a gun toting right wing MAGA nut on the trail than a fucking bear, thats not even a hard question to answer, its a fucking bear.

    Im left wing by a long shot but I still know that even the average right wing MAGA nut is actually prolly still gonna be, on average, helpful and/or friendly, or maybe just cold and indifferent towards me, out in the wilderness.

    Hell I’d actually honestly say this scenario is one of the few times I’d choose a MAGA right wing nut over a fellow left leaning fellow.

    I love my fellow liberals but I also have to acknowledge the vast majority of us are city slickers, many many of which prolly couldnt even start a fire if their life depended on it (cuz its just not a thing that matters in the city)

    Meanwhile the odds the random selected MAGA right wing gun nut prolly shows up with hunting equipment and knows how to do shit like make a lean to and skin a rabbit.

    If I got to pick between the two, I’d choose the gun nut cuz Id rather risk surviving with a gun nut than dying with a fellow city slicker, love yeah all but like, we aint fuckin surviving in the woods long, thats just a fact lol.

    Edit:

    If you seriously think this sort of statement is okay to make, I dare you to replace “man” with “black man” and go post it to prove how it’s totally not a bigoted statement

    Cuz any argument you try and make about “man” in this statement should hold water even if you change it to “black man” without suddenly sounding super fuckin racist.

    • SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world
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      11 days ago

      Don’t get me wrong, in your situation, where you are man alone in the wilderness, meeting another person is really not so terrifying of a concept. Bears aren’t likely to attack and maul you tbh, but neither is the “gun nut” in your hypothetical.

      This isn’t what women are talking about when they say “I’d choose the bear”. They are actually referencing a genuine fear many of them have being alone around men. Reportedly 14.8%, or roughly 1 out of every 6, women in America has been raped. And between the ages of 16-24, they are 3-4 times more likely to be raped or sexually assaulted. Meaning these fears are at their peak during formative years.

      We could argue till we are blue in the face over which is more likely to attack, a bear or stranger in the woods, but it would be completely missing the point of the discussion.

      Many women have genuine fears and/or PTSD regarding being alone with men, and so when asked what they would feel safer encountering alone in the woods, they choose the bear. Even if you believe their choice is the “wrong one”, please try to understand what they are trying to communicate by making it.

      • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        They are actually referencing a genuine fear many of them have being alone around men.

        It still makes you sound stupid, tbh, when you admit you haven’t a clue how much more threatening a fucking bear is.

        A man, no matter how scary, isn’t going to tear your fucking arms off with one hand lol

        It demonstrates a degree of naivety that you truly have never actually seen a bear in person.

        It just makes the person sound stupid.

        At least pick an animal that is less of an instant threat. Like a cougar.

        A bear will literally reduce you to multiple pieces without a second thought, and with barely any effort. It’s a bear

        • SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world
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          11 days ago

          To be honest, being so unable to grasp the point being made makes you sound… stupid tbh. But I don’t actually think you are stupid, so I assume you are just really dug in deep with how much “choose the bear” annoys you (maybe because you are offended on behalf of men, or on behalf of bears?).

          So you want to call it stupid instead of just being willing to acknowledge “choosing the bear” is a polite way of saying “men assault women at such a high rate that women are genuinely terrified to be alone with them.” And honestly, it demonstrates a degree of naivety that you have never truly experienced the constant threat of sexual assault for you to consistently think this was ever about bears.

          • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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            11 days ago

            No.

            I get the point, I have always gotten the point.

            My point is it’s a stupid sounding way to try and make the point, because it doesn’t actually translate well.

            Instead you just sound like a naive inexperienced idiot and make yourself look bad.

            You either come across as so hyperbolic you just sound sexist, or, you sound like a naive idiot.

            Let me demonstrate for you.

            If soneone told you given the choice of being alone in the woods with a black man or a bear, they’d feel safer with a bear, how does that sound now?

            Do you still think that sounds “hyperbolic”, or do you maybe now see how fucked up and stupid it makes you sound?

            That’s how women who genuinely say that shit sound.

            • SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world
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              9 days ago

              I get the point, I have always gotten the point.

              See, I knew it couldn’t be because you are stupid! But then why did you waste both of our time talking about bear survival?

              given the choice of being alone in the woods with a black man or a bear, they’d feel safer with a bear, how does that sound now? Do you still think that sounds “hyperbolic”, or do you maybe now see how fucked up and stupid it makes you sound?

              Oh, maybe you are stupid… Like, to try and conflate the fear of rape to racism… talk about fucked up and stupid. I’m getting embarrassed for you…

              You keep trying so hard to change the idea being expressed when women “choose the bear”. Let’s take your demonstration to it’s logical conclusion. Let’s say a stranger demands to be let into your home at night, or asks you to come alone into a dark alley, would you do it, would you feel safe? Now let’s say the stranger was black, did that change literally anything? Or is it a dangerous situation regardless of race, and you would still prioritize your safety?

              Women are not being bigoted when they express concerns over sexual assault. They aren’t trying to take men’s rights away, they aren’t saying “all men are rapists”. They are sharing the very real fear they feel from the very real threat of sexual assault. And they know not every man is going to assault them, but they also know that given the chance, a frighteningly large number will. Since they can’t know which one until it’s to late, they have to play by gun safety rules and treat all men like they might. Not to be mean, but to stay safe.

              Now if you would get your head out of your rear, you might start to actually hear women when they “choose the bear”, and what they are really saying. So even if you think the thought experiment is dumb, please try to grasp that it is just light-hearted way to bring up a real issue facing women. And your points about bear safety and it being hyperbolic are so unimportant and miniscule compared to the actual conversation at hand, that you are just wasting everybody’s time.

              Imagine seriously thinking the most important thing you can add to the conversation is that you think women are expressing their fears over being raped in a “fucked up and stupid” way.

              • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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                10 days ago

                All that typing but you wouldn’t write it.

                Deep down inside you know it’s a sexist statement, but you’ll twist yourself into a pretzel trying to justify it.

                It’s sexist, get over it and just admit it. It’s a shitty thing to say.

                Fear is fear, you can’t pretend justifying sexism with fear is any better or worse than justifying racism with fear or justifying any other type of bigotry with fear.

                If some TERF shithead posted “I’d feel safer alone in the woods with a bear than with a trans woman in the bathroom” or some shit you know how bad that would be.

                You have to sit and look in the mirror and confront the fact that you think sexism directed towards men “doesn’t count”.

                It does. And until the general public wraps their heads around what should be a very simple concept, shitheads like Trump are going to keep getting elected by reactionaries

                • SquirtleHermit@lemmy.world
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                  10 days ago

                  Deep down inside I know it is a cry for help, not a sexist statement. And if you thought about it, you would too.

                  It’s very telling that you tried to undermine “Choosing the Bear” by replacing the man with a “black man” or a “trans person”. You wanted to co-opt the bigotry thrown at an oppressed group to add a charge of oppression to the “choosing the bear”. But women aren’t the oppressors, they are being oppressed, not just legally with abortion rights, but specifically physically with sexual assault.

                  What if we swapped your embarrassing attempt at rewriting the scenario and made it fit the reality more, where the man and woman were replaced with another group of oppressors and oppressed?

                  Say 1939, Nazi Germany. You are talking to a Jewish person that has recently escaped Germany, and in an attempt to explain how terrified they were of the Nazi’s they tell you “I would have rather encountered a Bear than a Nazi alone in the woods”. Well, given all your knowledge of bears, you immediately rebuttal with “that’s so ridiculous and naive of you! Not all Nazis attack Jews, and a bear is a bear! Why you are being bigoted against Nazi’s just by implying!”

                  Sure, Nazi’s are the go to extreme example, but it’s far more apropos to keep they dynamics of the scenario intact.

                  So do you maybe now see how much you would have missed the point, and how much attacking their method of communicating their fears is a sick and twisted thing to do?

                  No, I doubt you do, you seem so stuck on the idea that women communicating their fear of sexual assault actually makes men the real victims.

                  Good luck with life man, I know you are not a bad person, your arguments have consistently shown your heart is in the right place. But the men who assault women really appreciate you standing up for them, and with that you are enabling harm.

                  • pixxelkick@lemmy.world
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                    10 days ago

                    What you are continuing to fail at is that I get the point.

                    I’m saying that the point is being conveyed atop a sexist mechanism

                    You might find this wild, but a cry fir help can simultaneously be sexist. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.

                    You are arguing about what is being conveyed on the mechanism.

                    I am arguing the mechanism being used itself is a shitty one

                    Things can be more than one thing at the same time, which is tough for some people to understand I guess.

                    If you continue to keep trying to argue that a sexist post being a “cry for help” somehow nullifies it’s sexism, then you will continue to make zero progress here and, more importantly, you’ll continue to keep being part of the problem

    • 14th_cylon@lemm.ee
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      12 days ago

      Any woman who says “the bear” honestly, I have to assume" has never once actually encountered a bear in the woods.

      i have to assume you never were a woman… is that correct assumption, smartass?